Comedy Clips

’tis June…

Happy Friday, all…a new month has begun; it’s the 1st of June, and summertime is just around the corner!

As you may know, I recently returned from a 3-week trip which had me headed ‘eastbound and down’ – nearly made it to the east coast but broke down in Erie, Pennsylvania so had to stay until a decent replacement bike could be acquired.  It was, and we made it home…that saga is a post for another day!


(This is a similar make and model of our bike – ours is a different color, too!)

I was watching the local morning news and was thinking back on the trip – we camped out often, so were without television and radio for a fair amount of time.  Being outside of cell-phone-tower range made it impossible to even check our phones for something as simple as the weather, which was necessary when camping!  We were able to keep up on those things when we rolled through towns or truck stops; some of them are fairly large and contain all of the modern conveniences you expect pretty much anywhere these days: Wi-Fi, flushing toilets, hot water from the taps, and your requisite fast-food chain serving up their ‘healthy options’ grub.  Being able to get a 2-bar, 3G signal from AT & T was good, unless you got bumped to a no-G Cellular One signal – then, you’re shit out of luck if you want to try to look at a news headline, a weather report, or a Mariners baseball score!  Damn, they positively spanked the Texas Rangers two nights in a row – 10-3 on Tuesday, and 21-8 on Wednesday…what a game!  😎
Damn Angels, though…they swept the Ms – time for vengeance!

Seattle Mariners Games

Regular season record: 23-30AL West standing: 3 Win percentage: .434
05/25
Angels
6
4
Mariners
05/26
Angels
5
3
Mariners
05/27
Angels
4
2
Mariners
05/28
Mariners
2
4
Rangers
05/29
Mariners
10
3
Rangers
05/30
Mariners
21
8
Rangers
06/01
Mariners
vs
White Sox
06/02
Mariners
vs
White Sox
06/03
Mariners
vs
White Sox
06/04
Mariners
vs
Angels
06/05
Mariners
vs
Angels
06/06
Mariners
vs
Angels
06/08
Dodgers
vs
Mariners
Digressing…I do that a lot, LOL – anyway, today’s top local headline had to do with a guy in Seattle, Washington (my city of birth and on-off residence) who opened fire on workers and patrons in a café that he had been kicked out of because of his belligerent behavior and rude treatment of others.  One statement made by his family members stood out to me: “I Wasn’t Surprised…”

These seem to be the recurring words being uttered following a violent rampage and/or standoff, culminating in the death of the perpetrator.  Check this out:
http://www.kgw.com/news/national/6-dead-in-Seattle-cafe-shooting-carjack-suicide-155916755.html

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-us-canada-18274274

Here’s another incident, which ended when the suspect fell to his death from a crane that he’d barricaded himself in.  Here, this man’s mother is repeating the (by now) standard trope, “I’m not surprised…”  Psychosis apparently runs in his family, so this behavior is expected and not shocking to her:
http://www.kgw.com/news/national/155288725.html

I saw the first headlines of this case being broadcast the day I got back from my trip – the crime gets more horrifying as more details are released; I can’t imagine being one of the eyewitnesses to this unbelievable deed:
http://www.kgw.com/news/national/Naked-man-shot-by-Miami-police-was-eating-face-of-other-man-154807745.html

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-us-canada-18241494

Next, this absolutely gawd-awful story out of Canada…seriously, the moon isn’t full yet but it seems as if everybody has gone collectively apeshit!  A porn star is being hunted for murdering someone and dismembering them – turns out now that the victim was the lover of the suspect – then sending the body parts via post to various addresses, including a Canadian political party:
http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-us-canada-18284242

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-us-canada-18299896

On the first night of our trip, we stayed in a hotel so I was able to see a bit of the news that evening and the following morning.  The two main stories were crazy to me: in one, a 6-year-old boy was being called a ‘sex offender’ for singing a stupid song from an M&Ms commercial to a girl – the one going “I’m sexy and I know it…”
http://abcnews.go.com/blogs/headlines/2012/05/first-grader-suspended-for-singing-im-sexy-and-i-know-it/

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IbbLCvUtHGo

Seriously?!?  A freakin’ kid is being called a sex offender for singing a song that a cartoon piece of candy was singing and dancing to?!?  A freakin’ kid is being called a sex offender?!?!?  Um, I invite you people to view ONE full episode of Toddlers & Tiaras, okay?  You watch what those psycho-bitches do to their kids, and then tell me who the fucking sex offenders are!!!  Gawds…what’s even more sickening, saddening, and maddening is that the little boy in question is non-white, so he’s already being set up as a criminal before he even understands what the word really means.  If he were a child with pale skin, he would be lauded as ‘cute and funny’ with a ‘spontaneous personality’ and be trotted out on the Today Show to be interviewed by Matt and Ann, much like the twin boys mentioned next.  One twin had illegally taken the place of the other in a contest and made a winning hockey-goal shot.  Since the actual contest entrant hadn’t made the shot, the win was nullified and voided (rightfully so).  The tantrum the boys had was made into a viral video, and they were praised (why?) and interviewed by local and national stations (again, why?) and lauded as near-heroes for…what, exactly?  Cheating and getting caught?  Someone explain that to me, please…then again, don’t…if you’re the type of mental midget that truly believes behavior like that deserves positive attention, then please keep your mouth shut.  I hope to the gawds that you have no children!  Really, why was it even news?
http://espn.go.com/nhl/story/_/id/6866543/twin-brother-winning-charity-shot-creates-50000-dilemma

Finally, this story also came out at the beginning of the trip.  Some guy abducted his former sister-in-law and her three daughters, killed the mother and the oldest daughter (14) and buried their bodies in shallow graves, then ran with the younger two.  When the authorities caught up with him and the two girls, he took the coward’s way out and shot himself in the head.  Amazingly enough, the man’s own wife, as well as his mother, HELPED HIM COMMIT THE KIDNAPPING.  More in this link here:
http://www.kutv.com/news/features/national/stories/vid_452.shtml

Seriously, is there something in the water?  Something in the air?  What the fuck is going on with people?  What the hell is wrong with everybody?  If only something as simple as a hug could fix it…
Many seem to be having spontaneous cranial combustions.  Or, they are finally being sucked into the vacuums that exist where their hearts and souls should be…a supernova of evil, snuffing out the innocents who happen to be in their malignant gravitational pull.  My mind floats to this song when I think of their slimy, corrupt minds…

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6Ovh4tsgoSE

%d bloggers like this: