Psychological Abuse online is real and not as easy to solve as pressing the “off” button

With the new racist and misogynist hack-attack on Leslie Jones, this post is pertinent for anyone who is dealing with trolls and cyber-bullies.

Art by Rob Goldstein

Bully Free Zone

Online abuse often takes the form of communications that are insulting, threatening, devaluing, and mocking.
Psychologically abusive people are called cyber bullies when the abuse happens online.
Cyber bullies will target your online activities, communications, and friends.
They will send you repeated unwanted messages or other kinds of communication.
They will intrude themselves in your online activities and will actively defame you on social networking sites.
They will gather information from your friends and encourage others to harass you, claiming to be harassed by you.
They will also approach your friends to get information about you or to create conflict in your relationship.
Abuse is always about control.
Abusers want to control the lives and actions of the people they target.
Abusers will also use alternate accounts on social networks to stalk and harass you.
From a “Healthy Place”
How to tell when you are dealing with online abuse:
Abusers…

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2 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Linda
    Aug 25, 2016 @ 13:05:08

    Cyber-bullying…it’s like the plague of the new millennium. You’re right too. I don’t know that I would want to end my Blog, Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, email accounts because some ass-hat had set his sights on me for whatever maniacal reason. That’s a lot to give up, and to rebuild. And in the meantime, you are cut off from friends, family, and colleagues with whom you communicate mostly on Facebook, or one of the above. Yes, there is text and phone, but the established “community”, online or not, is still disrupted. And it’s not fair that someone can do this to anyone without some form of consequence. I know you can report bullies to Facebook/Twitter etc. And emails, texts, and phone calls are easily blocked also. But what when, as you said, they bring other people along to bully their victim? I have actively blocked and unfriended people. And friends of friends also… In my case, I found out how one such abuser was linked to me through a mutual friend. I contacted that person and spoke to them. In my case, my friend unfriended the nasty person who had been so rude and abusive toward me. I now have a rule for my Facebook page: the only “friends” on my page are people I have met in person and who are actually friends with me outside of social media. My only VERY rare exceptions to this rule are certain friends of trusted friends who I don’t know well, but are usually involved in Facebook activities with my other “actual” friends. These handful I have come to trust as decent people because they are face-to-face friends with decent people. Until we find a way to take real action against bullies on the internet, I think everyone is going to come up against the jerk who knows he/she can say anything to anyone without accountability. Most people are very nice and decent. But there are the few that make me question my faith in humanity.

    • sepultura13
      Aug 25, 2016 @ 13:36:03

      So true, so true – cyber-bullying is indeed one of the new plagues of the millennium. In my case, in the online gaming world, there are means of reporting bullies – but the reports seem to go nowhere. On top of that, a person who “excessively reports bullies” is just as subject to having their accounts terminated, more so than the bully who is violating the Terms & Conditions of the game! Basically, the victim has to go “above and beyond” to prove the bullying, while the bully and their cohorts in their respective cliques are allowed to continue their ass-hat behavior unabated. Sometimes, I feel that some of the supposed game “moderators” are in the bullying crowd!

      I basically have to take screen-shots of the T&C every time they are updated, so that when I report another player, I can refer to the specific line and article of the T&C that is being violated. Unfortunately, that doesn’t cover the people who have disgustingly offensive usernames or avatar handles…slightly misspelled, or substituting one letter for another…but you still know exactly what they are intending with their names.

      If I had Facebook, I’d do the same thing as you – the only ‘friends’ allowed would be people that I know, and trust, IRL.

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